Lifeline Booklet 2021 Specific to S3

WHAT IF THEY GET ANGRY WHEN I ASK? An angry person usually wants connection or action. They want to be heard and taken seriously. An angry person is in an ‘active’ state, so the person may be more willing to act, make changes or do something. By connecting with an angry person, acknowledging their feelings, and allowing them to calm down naturally, you are showing respect and empathy. It is important to recognize that by acknowledging the person’s anger it does not mean you agree with their anger. ANGER • Keep yourself outwardly calm • Actively listen • Acknowledge their anger • Be aware of your safety • Boundaries – personal, • physical and workplace

Paraphrases capture the essence (or most important details) of what has been said and reflect it back. For example: Original statement I have just broken up with Steve. The way he was treating me just got too much. I tried loads of times to bring it up, but he would just get mad and walk out. It’s a relief now that it’s over. Paraphrased You feel much better after breaking up with Steve. Other examples: • It sounds like you’re feeling…right now • You’re feeling…at the moment • You might be feeling…at the moment • Perhaps you could be feeling... • You look as if you may be feeling... • From what you’re saying... Like paraphrases, summaries restate the key details or points from the conversation. Accurate summaries reinforce that the person has been heard accurately and what they have said is valued by the listener.

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Helping Ourselves and Others

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